They collapsed to the floor of the shower still clinging to one another. Kakashi’s voice cracked when he finally spoke, “I almost…. There was this kid and I almost…. Just an innocent little kid…” He trailed off, and Iruka closed his eyes, trying hard not to think about how much worse this would have been if Kakashi’s training had completely taken over, and he’d killed the child.


"Shh, ashele, shhhhh.” Iruka whispered into the silvery hair, “It's okay, I promise it's going to be okay." He’d heard this tone in his voice before, usually when one of his students came to him with some ‘dire’ problem that had left them crying, like Kakashi was now, the sobs wracking his chest as the tears blended with the trails of water from the shower raining down on them. Iruka nuzzled his face into the soft hair, rubbed Kakashi’s back in gentle circles, and continued whispering words of comfort until the water started to turn cold.


OOOOOOOOOOOOO


Kakashi woke alone in a bed that wasn’t his, but that smelled overwhelmingly of a certain chuunin teacher who, he was hoping, didn’t hate him. He got up slowly, hitching the now familiar blue flannel pants higher on his hips, stretched and walked out towards the kitchen. He paused in the doorway, and Iruka looked up at him and looked back down just as fast, gesturing in the general vicinity of the table. Kakashi took the hint and lowered himself slowly into the chair.


"Tea or coffee?" Iruka questioned, turning back to the stove.


"Tea," Kakashi had always preferred it to coffee – it tasted better. He only drank coffee if he was on a mission and needed the caffeine.


"I wasn't sure how you liked your eggs so I made omelets..." Iruka set the plate down in from of him, returning a second later with the tea.


"Maaa, it doesn't really matter to me the day after a mission. Just as long as it's something other than rations or soldier pills." He sipped his tea, but waited for Iruka to sit down before taking a bite. Silence settled between them as he worked up the courage to ask the question that had been bothering him since he woke. "Iruka?"


"Yes, Kakashi-san?" Iruka was staring at his food like it was the most fascinating thing in the world.


"Kakashi." He corrected, smiling at the man across from him when Iruka started.


"Ano…K-Kakashi?" Iruka stumbled slightly over the name, but managed to get it out mostly intact.


Kakashi continued to gaze at the top of the chunnin’s head, wishing that the other man would look up so that he could have this conversation face to face. "Did I hurt you? Last night?"

Iruka’s head shot up, finally meeting his eyes for the first time that morning, and the color rose quickly to his cheeks before he sharply looked away.

“Shit.” Kakashi swore. “I must have.” Iruka kept his face turned aside, but opened his mouth as if he was going to say something. "I'm so sorry. I wasn't thinking; I…I wasn't myself. I would never...!"



"It's not that!” Iruka interrupted. “Y-you didn't hurt me. Really! I'm just... embarrassed."



Kakashi sat back and blinked stupidly, "I thought they explained everything." Did the Hokage not warn him that something like this might happen? Just more evidence to explain why he didn’t run screaming when he was asked to by my touchstone….


"They did.” Iruka paused, “Well, not that particular aspect of if, but don't worry.  I….I already knew. I was there, and..and… Well it's not like I've never had mission sex before..." Iruka's eyes widened, and blush was spread down his whole neck.


The chunnin still refused to meet his eyes, "Look at me." Kakashi demanded.


"But you don't have your mask on!"


Kakashi burst out laughing at the indignant protest; he couldn't help it. This, of course, did nothing to calm the furious heat in the Iruka’s face. "Maaa, Iruka-sensei, you're the first person to avoid getting a look at me without my mask.” He paused, “Especially after you’ve seen my face."


"I didn’t! I wasn't paying attention to what you looked like."


"You weren't looking at my face when you were checking it for wounds? Or how about when I was kissing you?" Kakashi chuckled. I was doing more than kissing you, but I’m still amazed that you didn’t throw me out of your house this morning, and I don’t want to tempt my luck. He’d discovered that Iruka had a fiery temper when provoked and had been the recipient of at least three pillows to the upside of his head in the short time that Iruka’d been his touchstone simply because he’d said something about the chuunin’s pajama pants riding a little low around his hips.


"It’s not that funny," Iruka grumbled.


"Well, I'll stop teasing when you look at me without blushing." He watched Iruka close his eyes and redirect the blood from his cheeks. The hind part of his brain happily supplied a small thought about whether or not that trick would work with other parts of his body, but Kakashi ignored it and moved while Iruka's eyes were still closed so that his nose almost touched the other man’s.

When the dark eyes opened, Kakashi wrapped a hand behind Iruka’s head and claimed his mouth in a very intense and needy kiss. He watched as the other man's eyes grew increasingly wider and the blush returned in force. Despite obvious embarrassment, though, Iruka leaned forward into the kiss, his mouth opening slightly to allow Kakashi to deepen it. The jounin pulled away only after Iruka’s eyes had slid almost closed and a slight moan had escaped his lips. He stepped back, giving Iruka a minute before he began to talk.


"You weren't 'just there,' you were there because I asked for you. Even though last night was…what it was, try to keep in mind that I knew it was going to happen eventually, and I had that in mind when I asked for a touchstone." He was trying to make Iruka understand that he had opened himself up to the chuunin more than he had with any other person. A quick screw was one thing, but breaking down entirely in front of someone else was a completely alien idea for most shinobi. He had known, when he’d started all of this, that it would happen at some point, and he desperately wanted Iruka to realize that he had specifically picked him. Iruka stared at him with a rather dumbfounded expression. "Maaa, at least you're looking at me. Although I can't decide if it's in terror or shock at how handsome I am..." The mismatched eyes curved up happily as he smiled.


Iruka blinked, "Sorry, Kakashi-sa…Kakashi.” He corrected himself, rushing through the name. “I just wasn't expecting that."


Kakashi's heart sank, and he turned away from the other man, mentally slapping himself for hinting at the possibility that he…. Baka!


"I meant the kiss!” Iruka yelped, and Kakashi wondered how much of his disappoint had shown on his face. “I wasn't expecting the kiss!" The faded blush returned full force, and Iruka buried his face in his hands. "Your food's getting cold you should eat." He mumbled through his fingers.


Kakashi chuckled but sat. "So back to the ‘don’t look at Kakashi’ game?"


"No, this is the 'stop the foolish blushing' game." Iruka corrected into his hands.


"Can I play too?” Kakashi said brightly. “How about I try to make you blush, and you try not to?” He rose and leaned forward, tugging at Iruka’s hands. “I think I'd be good at this game, but you’ve got to let me see your face."


Iruka swatted his hands away. "How about you eat your breakfast so that you can go turn in your report, and I can get to class. Preferably without looking like a tomato."



Kakashi cocked his head to one side, pursing his lips in thought. "I think it’s more of a cherry."


He never knew that Iruka could have such deadly aim with one hand over his face when he was armed with just a cube of ham.